Teresa Garratty: 8 Christmas cracker jokes about deaf people!

Posted on December 18, 2017

Here we go again, we can’t put it off any longer…Christmas is nearly upon us.

There’s lots of things to love about Christmas; alcohol, food, presents…more alcohol…but there are also plenty of things to hate, like Christmas cracker jokes…terrible Christmas cracker jokes.

So without further delay, in this special Christmas edition article, may I present to you a selection of deaf tailored Christmas Cracker jokes that you’ll wish you’d never laid eyes on!

  1. How do deaf pigs communicate?

With SWINE language!

  1. What did the police say when they arrested a deaf person?

“You have the right to remain…oh, never mind…”

  1. Why do farts smell?

To make them accessible to deaf people!

  1. “Doctor, I think I might be deaf!”

“What are the symptoms?”

“A yellow cartoon family but why is that relevant?”

  1. How do you win an argument with a deaf person?

Turn off the lights!

  1. Did you hear the one about the deaf guy?

Neither did he…

  1. What do you call a deaf writer/illustrator?

Whatever you like, they can’t hear you!

  1. What’s the best thing about hearing aids?

Turning them off!


You know what…I actually quite like that last one, it’s almost worth the paper hat!

Have a great Christmas everybody!

Read more of Teresa’s posts (with cartoons!) by clicking here.

Teresa is a freelance film maker, photographer and full time cynic. At school, she was voted “Most likely to end up in a lunatic asylum”, a fate which has thus far been avoided. Her pet hates are telephones, intercoms and all living things. Follow her on Twitter as @TGarratty

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