At weekends, we post some of our most popular blogs. Tell us your favourites by emailing thelimpingchicken@gmail.com
“Do you know Braille?” “Can you drive?” “Can you read?” “When you have sex, is it quiet?” “Do you need a wheelchair?” “You are too beautiful to be Deaf.” “Hold my hand, I will help you walk over there.” “I totally understand, my dog is deaf, too!” “Can you hear me?” What about now?Now?!”
“I am so sorry you are Deaf!”
I have lost count of how many people say they wish they could be Deaf.
There are various reasons why they would say that, like the scratching sound on the chalkboard or a loud baby cry.
However, not all people are cut out to be Deaf. You have to go through the difficult times to truly grasp what being Deaf is like.
Being Deaf is exhausting sometimes, since you have to encounter language barriers, ignorant people and feeling isolated in the hearing world.
Here are THE PROS:
Be a part of a rich and diverse culture that most people do not often experience.
Have the ability to be a part of both Deaf and hearing worlds.
Automatically have friends in the Deaf community that will stick around for the rest of your life.
Learn sign language.
Be bilingual in ASL and English, or even multilingual if your family converses in another language.
Be skillful at reading body language.
Learn to read at an accelerated rate and be an expert speller.
Have your class notes printed out ahead of time as you cannot write and watch the interpreter at the same time.
Be a better driver than hearing people because your peripheral vision is enhanced.
Have a deep and private conversation with someone else in sign language through a window, underwater, in a church or in a loud crowded place.
Will not be able to hear your baby wail 3557326 times a day.
Sleep through ANYTHING.
Can still ‘hear’ music through sign language and vibrations.
Be able to concentrate on a book, homework, work projects, etc without any distractions.
Get a front row seat at shows since that is where the interpreter is at.
Get discounts at certain parks/places just for being Deaf.
Here are THE CONS:
People believe that all Deaf people can speak, read lips fluently and/or want cochlear implants. They think cochlear implants and/or hearing aids ‘cure’ deafness. Click hereto hear what cochlear implants sound like.
Always have to be on your best behavior, because you represent the Deaf community.
Be prayed over by an old lady holding your ears with her hands asking God to bless your ears.
Some people will see you as a disabled person that cannot function in life. Always be judged/oppressed by society.
People let you participate in activities but do not give you the chance to win.
Get a job interview but they never call back about a job even though you are a perfect match because they find out you are Deaf.
Be bullied in school when other kids mock you by signing.
Have a Jehovah’s Witness knock at your door to get you to join the deaf program at their church because someone told them you are Deaf. Privacy invasion.
Be the last person to laugh at a joke among hearing friends.
Feel like an outcast at hearing family events.
Some people try to take advantage of you because they think you are simple-minded.
Not all places obey the ADA law. Not all TV or online shows have closed captioning. Not all events are Deaf-friendly.
People still assume it is accurate to call you mute, deaf & dumb or hearing impaired. Mute, dumb or hearing impaired have a negative derogatory connotation. Please call us Deaf or HoH (hard of hearing). If you are not sure about which term to use, just ask us.
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Once in a while, I will find myself wishing I could hear my daughter’s laughter. However, I am not cut out to be hearing. I cannot deal with constant background noise.
When I am chatting with a hearing person via sign language, that person often gets distracted by noises, interrupting our conversation. I do not want to hear gossip. I do not want to hear bad music.
Also, I prefer to communicate with my hands rather than use my voice.
Still think YOU are cut out to be Deaf?
Elizabeth is a Deaf mom lifestyle blogger over at Mommy Gone Tropical. She writes about navigating her life journey as a Deaf mom to a hearing child. She shares plenty of motherhood stories, her family’s adventures, product reviews, DIY tutorials, etc.
Rosie Malezer
September 24, 2016
*nods vicariously while reading, reminding myself why I prefer solitude*
donaldo of the wasatch
September 25, 2016
I appreciate your effort in sharing Dr. Doman’s example. I have worn first, hearing aids from 1955 and then CI’s from 2012-14. The second example in your U-Tube presentation ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT SOUND LIKE what I heard at anytime with my CI – never. The first example is what I hear. That second example is simply nothing I have ever heard. Apparently my brain has evolved to hear beyond those limitations. So I would say you are guilty to some extent of spreading a falsehood without offering additional explanations. There are scientific explanations as to why. You provided none.
I cannot phantom how to hear music via vibrations and sign language. I do not know of any hearing people that can relate to your statement.
I find it ironic that you are trying to tell the world what something sounds like when you apparently do not hear anything? Am I right? No culturally Deaf individuals is a credible witness for what many deaf individuals who use all the hearing modalities available can do. So how can the Deaf Culture be an expert on technology that they refuse to acknowledge and use? Please respond.
Otherwise I relate to many of your examples. I have never found the Deaf Community exciting nor vibrant in my many associations with them. In general they cannot relate to doctoral level education experiences and explanations. I am told directly by interpreters to “dumb it down” because they don’t understand. They treat me as a traitor, because I was able to use my residual hearing capacities?
Why is learning Sign Language wonderful? I feel it is like accepting a gift that is unusable. Unless the Deaf Community accepts you, which they did not with me, where would I ever use it? For my personal situation it is no more relevant than learning the aboriginal native Navajo Language. Even the Navajo’s language is becoming extinct because it serves no relevant purpose beyond “culture.”
So your explanations fail many measures of correlation to explain the lives of myself and many of my peers that are becoming progressively a larger segment of the population of deaf individuals. You need to be far more careful about writing on some issues that you really have little or no comprehension of. The Ku Klux Klan positioned themselves as a Christian organization. They were absolutely un-Christian. So please, lets see some smarter and more carefully articulated and presented material from the Limping Chicken on the subject of being deaf. Fewer and fewer subscribe to the suggestions presented here.
You need to qualify that you speak for yourself and your Deaf peers but beyond that population you do not.
Beyond that I accept that you speak for yourself. Good luck.
Hartmut
September 30, 2016
@Wasatch,
you are phonic-centric. You are DETERMINED to be so. Your choice!
You had functioning hearing and was losing it. Still you are hearing and have always been, despite the diminished functionality of hearing. For you deafness equals hearing loss and is an issue of your health.
“I am deaf, but not my ears” have been my lifelong motto. For us, it is NOT a hearing loss. I have never searched for it, since I acquired deafness at the age of two.
Your labeling Navajoh language is incorrect (your use of adjective doubling “aboriginal native” is derogatory and highly condescending beside the improper use of doubling in addition to covert racism. What you do not know is the Navajoh did help the US defeat Japan in the WW II. See the movie Wind Whisper. Perhaps your covert racism prevent you from acknowledging this.
Why do you want to perpetuate audism? You are refusing to be a Roman when in Rome!
Hartmut
September 30, 2016
@Elizabeth Edgar,
I share with some of your Pros and Cons Some of them require a closer look. Here among others, listed at random (not in importance):
1. I never could learn to read at accelerated pace. My reading is quite slow. I know, when I was reading a book as an 18 year old with my 10 year old brother. He always finished both sides whenever I was on the last line of the left page, although I was a “speedreader” among my deaf peers. This is because reading well and speedily requires the auditory fluency of a spoken language. Your case is extremely rare. Perhaps you belong to the top one percent in speedreading among the deaf population.
2. Perception and enjoyment of music. What we get from music is only the rhythm part of it, not the melody of tones. The vibration carries only a small portion of the sound spectrum, most likely not above 2K cps. We do perceive the most extreme low vibrations, those a human ear cannot get. I sensed the low frequency tone of a malfunction of a farming machine while my hearing father and older brother did not. We would enjoy the rhythm only after learning to associate it to our body movements. So what is dancing about for us. I essentially dance without music, as Nyle DiMarco, the winner of the Dancing With the Stars showed in one episode and made her dance partner and co-dancers dance without music for five minutes.
3. Many of your Pros are essentially accommodations to cope in the auditory world and allow us to participate as equals in it, Those accommodations are not needed within our own world.
4. Some of the Pros may be deemed to constitute Deaf Gain, our contribution to the whole world. Sign Language is one. The world-wide collegiate and collective mentality is the other one. Another pro is how a Deaf eye sees what a good architecture and cinematography should be. DeVIA as the name of the Deaf genre in visual arts emphasizes bold and contrasting colors. For example, the 16th century painter Juan Navarrete, known as “El Mudo”, engl. The Mute) changed the Italian Renaissance Style of Rafael and Tician to the Spanish Renaissance one, which emphasizes strong colors and contrasts. His style was emulated by the following hearing Spanish painters.
5. As to the Cons: Most of your Cons are audistic behaviors anyway. They need to be remediated to make the society, to which we also belong, more humane. English, like many other spoken languages, contain several audistic vocabulary and expressions. You named some already. They all presume as sine qua non the “normalcy” of being able to hear, and its lack as deficiency, requiring repair through medicine. The word “mute” and by derivation “verbal” presume the primacy of speech for communication. Sign language as an aberration, as a “non-verbal communication”.
6. Here in my area, only Deaf JW and hearing signers knock on my doors. BTW, their ASL movies are much better done than other Deaf filmmakers. The ASL is “pure”, no contamination of English signing at all.