Teresa Garratty: As we communicate more through text, words should be chosen carefully

Writing can be hard. That’s especially true for some people whose first language is a sign language and to be honest, a lot of people in general.

But we live in a modern digital age where more and more people communicate via written word. I personally have a plethora of messaging apps clogging up my phone and I chat with pretty much the same people across all of them.

I’ve got a brother that only uses Twitter and Google Allo, the rest of my family and friends are on Facebook, WhatsApp or Instagram (I’m cool with Insta by the way, because my stories are always lit.)

Anyway, the point is, that we’re always connecting and building relationships via text these days, whether its a status update, tweet or DM. So written English has become socially important and while it does indeed help us make connections, it also has horrible drawbacks.

Just to be clear, this isn’t an article having a pop at everyone’s written English skills, I could care less if you’ve used the wrong tense, no punctuation or typo’d “Ducking” instead of “F…”, never mind. So long as I understand you, it’s all gravy. After all, I’ve probably made at least 5 spelling/grammatical errors so far and we’re not even half way down the page!

Everything about sending and receiving information via text relies heavily on interpretation. Not the usual kind that you read about on this site, but a more personal kind.

There’s no way of sensing someone’s tone, mood or intention when you can’t see them face to face (and if there of a similar personality type to Norman Bates, sometimes it’s not even possible even then!). So you kind of have to piece together missing parts by way of imagination and if like me, you suck at that, then this can make things go from 0-100 pretty darn quick. For literally no reason at all.

There are some ways to express your self visually like GIFs, emojis etc and we all know that sending fire memes is the only way to a girls heart these days. Ditch the flowers and the poetry, sending pictures of Kermit the Frog sipping tea is the new mating ritual.

But when it comes down to it, words are meaningful, they have power and so you should choose yours carefully. The pen is mightier than the sword. Well, the keyboard in this case.

Let me throw an example your way. Let’s say your talking to someone, you ask them something and their response is “I’m not bothered”. Maybe it’s the director in me, but I’m gonna need more context than that if I’m gonna let it slide.

There could be plenty of different ways to take that statement. Are they not bothered about the subject? Are they unsure of their decision? Are they having a stressful day? Or are they not bothered about YOU?

You see the last one poses a problem. It’s rude, it’s hurtful and downright disrespectful. What’s to say that the receiver of that message isn’t having an equally stressful time and that’s the last thing they need to hear/read?

You might think it’s OK to pass the blame onto whoever takes it the wrong way. It’s not you’re fault if that’s how it gets interpreted. You can’t control what they think and feel, right? That may be so, but guess what? It’s not their fault either.

If you’re a decent human being with even a shred of empathy lurking in your tin, hollow chest, you could at least make an effort to be kind. It doesn’t take much. Just a smiley emoji here, a friendly “x” at the end of a message there. Sometimes changing up the words helps too. How about “Whatever you think is best.”, instead of a flat out juvenile “I’m not bothered.”?

And if you’re still too stubborn/lazy/callous to admit that I’ve got a point, well then, I look forward to meeting your mothers taxidermied corpse that lives in the basement!

This doesn’t just apply to private messaging and personal relationships. It’s important for businesses and associations to choose their words carefully too (if not more so!) Imagine reading that a company you admire and respect states outright that they “do not support” something that’s a part of your lifestyle. Not a nice feeling.

You might think this all a pedantic subject but the world needs more kindness wherever it can get it. It’s so easy to be rude, but it takes a lot of heart to be gentle and kind.

And if you ever get the offer of having a face to face conversation with someone, grab that opportunity with both hands. Go with the flow! That’s how you really get to know someone and start to build something…unless of course that sort of thing “bothers” you.

 

Read more of Teresa’s posts (with more cartoons!) by clicking here.

Teresa is a freelance film maker, photographer and full time cynic. At school, she was voted “Most likely to end up in a lunatic asylum”, a fate which has thus far been avoided. Her pet hates are telephones, intercoms and all living things. Follow her on Twitter as @TGarratty