Tyron Woolfe: What’s #motherfatherwell all about? Read on… (with BSL)

MotherFatherWell?

What is #motherfatherwell?

There’s even a hashtag on it(!)

Watch Tyron signing his article below, or scroll down to continue in English!

I think there may be a linguistic term for it? It’s a very Deaf cultural way of asking “how are you and your family?”

We know in communities there are classes, ranging from the posh to the poor.  I did Sociology as one of my A levels, so I’m aware of different theoretical points of view that are never-ending regarding class differences.  

But all members of a strong deaf community use this too regardless of class; not only deaf families but usually people who know you and your parents.  

It’s probably come about because the deaf community is so close- knit, and if you come from a deaf family it is likely people will know both you AND your parents.  

There are also those who have active hearing parents who have done a lot for deaf charities, or those who have visited one another’s families since a child – often an experience held when boarding at school.

It wouldn’t be very ‘cultural’, I think, to be saying “How are you?” And then “How’s your family?” in the deaf community. This is usually asked in a rushed manner; “Mother father well?”.  And believe me, the pace is very quick, its like mother-father-well in the span of 1 second!

When intoxicated, I believe my friends and I get carried away and it becomes the line-of-the-night, everyone going to each other saying “Motherfatherwell?”, with very mixed replies in humorous way e.g. “My Mother is well, but my father died 22 years ago”. Weird, black humour, but yes, people laugh hysterically often at such unexpected replies.

At the City Lit Deaf Day I was in a humorous mood after meeting so many people who visited the Deaf LGBTIQA stall I was volunteering for. I had met so many deaf people through the course of the day who had asked me #motherfatherwell and also #brotherwell too!

One of our visitors was the Metropolitan Police.  This lovely copper was amused, I think, with me and my humour and we got rather sociable with others standing around the stall.  I asked her if she had a pair of handcuffs, I thought it would be a funny picture to take, and even to do a short video clip.

She and her colleague agreed, they went off to bring the pair of cuffs and before I knew it, she was demonstrating in my video how they think deaf people should be cuffed; with their hands in front of them, side by side.  

The copper was giving emphasis that deaf people should not be cuffed with hands behind their bodies or crossed over as it restricts their signing ability.  

I was enjoying the role play, and within the span of 5 minutes I decided to share the photos and a video both from my own personal social media, but also from Deaf LGBTIQA.

A prominent feature in the video was that I had signed “MotherFatherwell” about 4 times whilst cuffed.  Many of my friends and family found it instantly hilarious. Some even said my creation of the hashtag #motherfatherwell was classic, funny.  

At the time of writing, its been viewed over 8000 times!!!!!!  I never, ever intended it. I had thought it’d be the usual few few shares and likes.  And I have my own views about social media – see blog from before.

I actually think the reason that DeafLGBTIQA’s tweet got retweeted and shared and liked so many times was the feature of the Police with deaf people.  

Deaf people have often had terrible experiences of being arrested and being unable to let the police know that they’re deaf. I think people out there who follow this account felt it was indeed “a brill tip” to be cuffing in this way, to allow deaf people to continue to sign with limited ability rather than other ways which would totally inhibit their communication.  

Even for deaf people who do not use sign language, the use of gesture to make communication easier is still needed. Many people in the LGBTIQA sector work with the police continually to improve the experience of marginalised people and they understand the experience of deaf people. And the hard work continues, I applaud them.

But of course some retweets and shares were by members in the Deaf Community who just get it re #motherfatherwell.

• Why do members of the Deaf community find the line hilarious?
• When should we laugh?
• How do we explain it easily to sign language students and people who join the Deaf community later?

Answers on a postcard please. Well actually, by adding a comment here or on the Limping Chicken Facebook Page!

Tyron is in his early 40s and loves a good laugh and cuddle with friends and family. He has worked for over 20 years with deaf young people. Tyron is the Chair of the Deaf LGBTIQA project, he also volunteers widely.  In between short pieces of work since travelling, Tyron is keeping an eye out for his next career move since travelling. Follow him on Twitter as @tyronwoolfe