Rebecca-Anne Withey: What happened when a group of hearing children questioned me about deafness…

I was recently interviewed by six and eight year old children. The school they attend are welcoming a deaf child this September and so I was invited to host a session where they could “ask me anything” in relation to deafness.

The children had never met a deaf person before and the questions they asked me were refreshingly blunt and brilliant. They took my deafness in their stride and let their curiosity lead the conversation.

It led me to thinking if only adults were as direct as kids and asked what was on their minds…! The children’s sense of open mindedness and wonder made for a really enjoyable chat about deafness, signing and lipreading. It also made them realise that deafness sure does have its perks! See an extract below…

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*Rebecca! I want to test your lipreading! If I say… “gobbledygook” can you lipread me?

Yes, you said gobbledygook.

*What if I say….. *whispers* “gobbledygook!”

You said exactly the same.

*But what about if I say… “supercalifragilisticexpaliadocious?!”

Ah, luckily I’m a Mary Poppins fan so I know it’s something quite atrocious (!)

*How about if I speak super fast like babeananakikipopa harahshfofhaiohahfafaga
?!

Then you’re just speaking nonsense.

(Children laugh)

*Are you a spy?!

No, I’m not a spy.

*But if you can lipread you should be a spy!

Well, if I was a spy I wouldn’t tell you would I?

*I thought if you were deaf you wouldn’t be able to talk but you’re TALKING!

Yes, it’s my ears that don’t work not my mouth.

*So are your ears dead inside?

Not quite. Inside our ears we have a circular thing like a shell with hairs on… when there’s a sound it travels inside your ear and the hairs all hold hands and do a Mexican wave to take the sound all the way to the brain! That doesn’t happen in my ears so that’s why I’m deaf.

*So some of your ear hairs don’t want to do the Mexican wave? Are they sitting down?

No, it’s more like they’re asleep.

*Can you wake them up?

No, they’re lazy.

(Children laugh)

*So why do you wear those hearing aids if you’re deaf?

The hearing aids help some louder sounds get through to my brain so I can hear some sounds…

*So the louder sounds with the hearing aid wake the hairs up?

Some of them, yes.

*Why did you have a purple hearing aid and not pink?

I like purple.

*I would have a pink one. Or a rainbow one.

Well, you don’t need one.

*I bet they keep your ears warm in the winter.

They do actually!

*Can you tell me some signing please.

What do you want to know?

*The word annoying. Because my brother is annoying.

(Laughs) okay I’ll show you that.

*If you’re left handed do you use your left hand instead?

Yes, you do actually!

*I also want to show you my favourite toy but it makes a noise so you might not be able to hear it but I’ll show you anyway…

Okay thank you. (Bends down to hear toy) Nope I can’t hear that.

*It sounds like a pig grunting, do you know what a pig sounds like?

I think so!

(Children begin grunting animatedly)

I’ll show you some signs for farm animals if you like?

*Yes please. But not the sign for sheep because I really don’t like sheep.

Okay, we won’t sign baa baa black sheep then!

*You know nursery rhymes and you’re deaf!!??

Oh yes, I know a lot of songs. I grew up with lots of music.

*Can you hear it like us?

Not anymore, but I used to be able to when I was younger.

*Are you sad?

Not really. I like the peace and quiet when I take my hearing aids out at night time, haha!

*Can you hear anything at bedtime then?

Nope, nothing.

*My baby sister is always crying at night time. I wish I was deaf at bedtime…

Kids eh? What’s the funniest thing a hearing child has asked you?