Meet Emi Booth, a music therapy student who is also deaf!

Hi Emi, can you firstly tell us a little bit about you?

I come from a small town in Scotland called Carluke. I have a BMus with honours in music from the University of Edinburgh. I have a severe hearing loss in my right ear and mild-to-moderate hearing loss in my left ear – I was born with the right ear’s hearing loss, and I’ve slowly lost my left ear’s hearing over time.

I love everything to do with music; I love going to gigs, I collect band merchandise and vinyl records and I also write music and post it to SoundCloud. I have a strong interest in music psychology and how to make music accessible and helpful for everyone.

Now you’re a music therapy student at The University of Derby, I wonder where did your passion for music begin? And what instruments do you play?

My whole family is musical – I’m one of five children and six out of seven family members play music. I grew up listening to my dad and big brother playing piano and I wanted to do it too, so I started learning piano when I was eight.

My parents were given a beautiful upright piano as a wedding present, and I used to push my feet against the board of the piano while I practised. Then when I was ten, a woodwind teacher visited our school and asked if anyone would like to learn a woodwind instrument, and I stuck my hand straight in the air. That was when I picked up the saxophone.

Over the years I’ve also been very into the ukulele, and I’ve always been a strong singer. I spent a couple of years at UK Theatre School and I was then in a youth musical theatre group for five years. So I’ve always had a strong passion for music, it’s always been a huge part of my life.

Thinking about it, I think my Dad was the strongest driving force for me being into music. He was enthusiastic about me learning piano, and used to send videos of me playing to my grandparents to show them how well I was learning.

I also got a lot of my taste in music from him; I’m a big fan of 80s rock, prog rock and new wave, and I link that back to him playing The Cure and Duran Duran in the car.

Who inspires you musically? Has anyone particularly encouraged you on your journey?

My favourite musical artist is Keaton Henson, so he’s definitely my biggest musical inspiration. I love him so much I have a tattoo dedicated to him on my ribs. His music is very intimate and emotional, and it showed me how you can pour your emotions into a song while also making incredibly dark and distressing thoughts sound delicate and beautiful.

There are a few people who have really encouraged me. My piano teacher when I was in high school was incredible – he cared about making sure I enjoyed the music I was playing, and he never made me feel bad for not succeeding at a certain pace. He did an amazing job of preparing me for a music university course – I don’t think I would have gotten my degree without his guidance. He even provided his house and recording equipment to record my audition pieces.

My family have also been incredible supporters. Every time I get a good grade, I call my mum to celebrate; if I’ve ever gotten a bad one, I call her to cry. Not only have they given me the financial ability to be down here studying, but they always talk to me about what’s happening and remind me that they’re proud of me and they believe in me.

Can you explain a little bit about your deafness and how you work around this to still enjoy music? What does music mean to you?

I was born with severe hearing loss in my right ear, and I’ve slowly been losing the hearing in my left ear over time. It’s a complete mystery though – I had a full MRI done on my head and we still don’t know why I’m deaf.

I view music as more than just something to listen to – it’s also something to feel and something to hear. As a child, I just never considered my hearing loss to be a problem, if I could go to a hearing school and live in a hearing world then why can’t I enjoy something that’s associated with hearing? Especially once I started studying in Edinburgh and I learned about graphic scores and the physics behind musical sound, I became fascinated about how you experience music without hearing it.

It did pose a lot of issues though. I wasn’t allowed to go to concerts until I was 16 because my parents didn’t know how delicate my left ear’s hearing was, so all my friends would go to concerts and I would be left out. Stereo music was always impossible for me to listen to as well because I always missed whatever music went into the right side of my headphones.

Imagine how frustrating that is being a massive Beatles fan! It was always “do I want an instrumental version of Yellow Submarine or an acapella version?” Certain melodies would disappear if they were too low or high for my ears to pick up, so growing up I always felt I was missing music. I think that’s one of the reasons I poured so much time into making and playing my own music – I wanted some control over my access to music.

Have you had to overcome any obstacles relating to your deafness to get where you are?

So many obstacles. A lot of people have been sympathetic as opposed to supportive of my hearing loss. A girl in my course once exclaimed it was such a shame that I could never appreciate an orchestra fully because I don’t have sound direction and struggle to pull out individual sounds.

I also did a one-semester course on Beethoven and had to listen to fully hearing musicians talk about how hard it must be to be a deaf composer, which was quite frustrating. I’ve been compared to Beethoven a lot, but I don’t want to be told I’m a copy of an old white male composer – he was incredible but I am my own musician, my own composer, my own person.

Disability adjustments within university have always been a bit of a challenge as well, especially in musical courses. It took a while to get adjustments put in place in my post-grad, and the help these adjustments bring are insane. I failed my first theory essay, but when I handed in a resit six months later (after disability adjustments had been put in place) my essay was suddenly marked in the 70s.

You mentioned in the Derby Telegraph that moving to Derby has been your first taste of the deaf community – what’s that been like?

I didn’t even identify as deaf before I moved to Derby. I considered my hearing loss an obstacle, not a part of my identity, and I would describe myself as hard of hearing because I didn’t feel like I had earned the title of deaf. But once I moved to Derby, I got hearing aids and sunk into learning BSL and I began to learn about the Deaf community.

I think a memorable moment would be the first time I ever spoke to deaf children. They asked what my sign name was and I said I didn’t have one, and they immediately began suggesting sign names for me. I felt welcomed, I felt like I belonged in that world. I never wore my disability like armour until I felt truly welcomed into the Deaf community, and suddenly I was proud of my disability instead of ashamed of it.

You’re currently on a placement at a deaf school, what’s that been like coming from a place with little exposure to the deaf community?

Yes, I’ve focused my second year of my music therapy course on learning about music therapy with D/deaf clients. I’ve learned how music therapy needs to be adapted for people with hearing loss; so much of music therapy theory is about how the clients hear music, but music therapy with deaf people becomes about how they feel and see the music.

I even found that some of the techniques recommended for working with deaf people rely on the clients having some hearing. I’ve created my own games and techniques to use in sessions, and I’ve reframed my understanding of how music can be made accessible so that deaf people can learn and grow through a medium that used to be considered inaccessible for them.

But I’m not a professional yet so I won’t be sharing my practices until I have all the necessary education to support my work.

What are your aims musically or career wise?

I have a few goals. I want to focus my work with D/deaf clients to help improve our academic understanding of music psychology in the Deaf community. My Independent Scholarship is all about displaying my experience of music as a deaf musician to show that we don’t experience less or wrong, just differently. And how we experience music is just as powerful and valid.

I’ve always dreamt of writing for an orchestra. I know that’s very vague, but I’ve written orchestral work before and just never had the opportunity to hear my music performed. I would also love to create art installations that invite hearing people to open their minds to the D/deaf experience of music. Ultimately I don’t mind whom I work with or where I perform, as long as my work is helping others.

I would love to get a PhD that focuses on the musical identities of Deaf people. I would also love to publish a book of compositions by current deaf composers, to uplift us in a proud way that shows we don’t need sympathy, we just want to make art.

Ultimately I want to push forward the academic and practical understandings about music therapy in the Deaf community, so we can help this community with our work.

How has University life been for you as a student with deafness?

As I mentioned earlier, it’s been a tough journey. In my undergrad, I would sit all audio-based exams on my own in a separate room, where I was allowed to ask for audio clips to be repeated. In both my undergrad and my postgrad, I’ve been given a dictaphone for lecturers to use so I can listen back to lectures in case I’ve missed anything.

Online lectures during lockdown were a bit of a godsend because suddenly my lectures had captions. Since I got my hearing aids, the university have brought in hearing loops for me to use, and even loaned me one to take to placement. I’m very grateful for the support I get, but it has been difficult to get those adjustments properly put in place over the years.

What would your response be to someone who said deaf people can’t play/enjoy music?

My response to that kind of sentiment is always “why is your way of enjoying music the only way to enjoy music?” I overcome the stereotypes by sharing my love for music and being unapologetically deaf. I post to my tiktok a lot about being deaf and a musician to share my love and also educate others on how not to be audist.

What advice would you give to any budding musicians who are also deaf?

Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t hear the music as well or that you’re missing out. Everyone’s experience of music is unique and yours is just as valid as everyone else’s. And don’t let any hearing people act condescending to you or give you sympathy – you don’t need sympathy. You are strong and powerful and your disability doesn’t prevent you from succeeding in your passions, it makes your success even more incredible.

 

Emi Booth is a music therapy student at The University of Derby.