Insight: I decided to change my career and become a birthing doula (BSL)

 As a Mother to my own four children, I believe that the time preparing for childbirth, the labour itself and the time shortly afterwards is so precious and goes by so quickly. There is also a real lack of information around in BSL for deaf people too. 

Early last year I was unexpectedly asked to be a birthing partner for a life long friend who was going through a pregnancy without a partner. I was thrilled and honoured to be asked to do this, and I did all that I could before hand to make sure my friend felt comforted, supported and informed. 

This friend in particular is deaf and I am hard of hearing. I wear hearing aids and although I mostly use spoken English, I can communicate in sign language and my deaf friends are a mixture of those who sign and those who don’t. 

I’ve always been quite flexible in my communication methods, and I’m quite a relaxed easy going person too so it’s never too much trouble if someone needs me to alter something to communicate more clearly. 

Going back to the birth journey with my friend, I surprised myself with just how much I enjoyed supporting my friend and how naturally the role came to me. I found myself offering intuitive insights and advice and it felt natural and empowering as a woman to support a friend to do a truly powerful act – birth a baby!

My friend went into labour a week or so before her due date and I took her into hospital, reassuring her of how she felt and encouraging her to use the breathing techniques and relaxation methods we practised beforehand to keep her feeling in control and calm. 

Her labour actually progressed very quickly which the nurses didn’t expect especially as it was her first baby, and she took it all in her stride. 

My friend didn’t have an interpreter in the room as the labour progressed too fast for the hospital to even get one! But the midwife communicated clearly and slowly and I was also there to reiterate everything too. That said, my friend kept closing her eyes so she did most of the work instinctively! 

When her baby was born it felt as though I had witnessed something extremely special and I felt it was such an overwhelming honour. 

In the days that followed I continued to support my friend, popping round with ready cooked meals, tidying the house in the short while I was there, holding baby while Mum had a shower… just little things that enabled baby and Mum to settle into their new chapter together. 

We are still close friends and I see her little one often, there is absolutely a life long bond there.

So when I began to feel restless in my last career, my friend said half-jokingly that I should be a midwife or a birthing expert or something along those lines. I don’t see myself as a medical person per se so training in midwifery isn’t for me. 

But when I looked up the role of a doula, I felt as though I had stumbled on something meant for me. 

Put simply, a doula is someone who supports a woman before, during and after childbirth. They are a comforting, supportive presence for your family. I had not come across this term before so I got in touch with the training provider to find out more. 

I knew that despite being the age I am, I had to bite the bullet and make a change because life is too precious to spend it being unhappy in a place that you don’t like.

I have since begun training in person, after initially starting a course online – as I found out that online training was not sufficient enough for me and my hearing loss – I needed to be able to see and listen to someone in real time, and be able to ask questions. 

The course leaders are very accommodating, allowing me plenty of time to ask questions and take things at a pace where I am able to follow and understand easily.

I now feel really excited to progress with this career and I feel excited about the families I have yet to meet who I can support. I am open to the families being deaf or hearing or anything in between – though I expect it will be wonderful to use BSL more and offer accessible support in a way that another doula wouldn’t be able to. 

I am no spring chicken age wise and so I never expected to feel so excited about starting a new career at this point in my life. It just goes to show that it’s never too late and that sometimes things happen for a reason to put you on the right path. 

This blog has been written anonymously as part of the Insight series  where readers are invited to share their story or news about their interesting job with The Limping Chicken. If you have a story to share please email rebecca@rawithey.com

Image courtesy of pexels.